My Last No Contact Pls 😭🥹

I’ve been in a toxic relationship for 2 years, and we’ve broken up so many times that I’ve lost count. We tried No Contact for 3 months for twice and b up for weaks(we literally broke up every month), but clearly, it didn’t work out. I always ended up begging for attention, any kind of bare minimum, because I couldn’t handle the emotional void left behind. Every time I felt like I could move on, I found myself reaching out again. I begged for the bare minimum, for them to show they cared, but it always felt like I was the only one trying. I'm 22 now he is my first bf and I really want to work out and sort out everything but when I try to communicate he always acts like a high schooler he is so immatured idk how to handle him,we starts with healthy way of communication then ends with fighting and swearing he triggers me alot now Im so patient lol .Everytime I sort things out we’ll back to square one and broken up again, .And I'm literally adjusting everything for him now he literally controlling me, i didn't want to see my future like that . I’m stuck in this endless cycle of emotional turmoil