I caved and co-slept.

Basically what the title says. I was strictly against cosleeping my whole pregnancy, and after my son was born I didn't mind it with supervision, as long as my partner was right there then I would sleep peacefully with my LO. But mil decided to come around with a cold and gave it to me and my son, and last night he refused to be layed down by himself, I was up till 10am trying to get him to sleep, finally he passed out from crying in his bassinet which I felt terrible about, but he woke up again about 11am and then I gave up. Put him in bed with me, did the c position and we fell asleep together and slept till 4pm when my partner got home for work. Idk I just feel awful because I was so scared and against it and now I feel like I'm careless, and a bad mom. I shouldn't of let his mil come, I shouldn't of put him in bed with me, I was just at my wits end.

Edit: you all have been great support! Honestly made me rethink my opinions on bedsharing and cosleeping. It is so much better to be ready and safe to do something like this then to wind up doing it on accident, or the have the terrible affects of sleep deprivation. I just want you all to know my little bug is doing so much better but now refuses his bassinet, so I've been doing better research on bedsharing, and started on my journey to safe cosleeping my LO. Again thank you all for your kind words. They mean a lot to a struggling ftm.