sex after kids is so different. feeling suddenly really conservative about it since I now know what the result feels like

Sex suddenly is this super sacred monumental thing cause I am hyper aware of the cost / potential outcome. Going through a full pregnancy and birth and raising a child is entirely different than hypothetically knowing that pregnancy can happen. I feel enlightened in a way that for the first time in my life I truly understand what it means to be female, though I thought I did before. I have so much more respect for myself and what it means to make myself sexually available. I used to laugh about saving yourself for marriage etc and now it all seems very reasonable, like sex was never supposed to be a super casual thing. And when I have sex now it is on an emotionally much deeper level as well.