fucking schizophrenia ruined my career

I am a writer, and I noticed that I was better at writing before the onset of this fucking disease. I notice that my writing is much worse than it was before, I find it way harder to construct ideas, sentences and thoughts. I still somewhat work, but I gotta compete with normal people who have regular skills. it makes me so fucking angry that this fucking disease destroyed my life completely, and I have no career options because of it. I don't know if i will keep up with my job, I may get fired for horrible writing. Fuck schizoprenia.