Does it help being arrogant / having a superiority complex?

In my life ive changed my modes of thinking between being a people pleaser and being arrogant and more narcissistic. The ironic thing is that people - especially women have treated me much better when I was the latter, but people have told me this was just "confidence" but i'm not entirely convinced. There seems to be something of the more you value yourself and make it known, the more other people will see you the same way too.