Anyone else kinda hate their birthday?

My birthday is coming up and im dreading it

I feel like it's one of those days where you have to be/act happy even if you really aren't. And if you act sad or mellow or numb or even just not happy enough people start asking a stupidly annoying amount of questions, asking "are you okay". No I'm not but I can't really say that now can I

I shut myself in the bathroom to cry like 5 times during my last birthday. Nobody knew because I didn't want to ruin the day even though it was supposed to be mine and about me.

Just makes me feel like a burden honestly

Anywho wish me luck to get through it